So far so good…

There is something scary about getting a BFP. You suddenly really really REALLY want to keep it. I’d take a BFN any day over getting a BFP and then losing it. Once pregnant you only want one outcome – a healthy baby. So of course that’s all I’ve been praying about.
On Friday I called the doctor’s office to ask if I could come in for a beta that day since I got a positive the day before. I was put on hold while they went to find out but then they came back to say that I’ve already been scheduled for Monday so I should just continue all my meds and just come in on Monday as planned.

That’s OK. I still would not have had anything but an initial beta at best. What one wants at this point is a doubling beta. And it takes two tests at least two days apart to determine that much.
Still, I have to have SOME reassurance between now and then, so plan B….. pee sticks.
I have of course been peeing since and comparing line darness. Horrible method, I know. But it is all I have for now.

Luckily, I’ve also been pretty busy with a lot of things going on this weekend, so there’s only so much time I can devote to obsessing. But on the flip side, I’ve probably lost count how many times I’ve had to lift and carry my toddler and exert myself beyond the recommended limit.

I do try, but we live in a real world. Not that it doesn’t make me worry. I checked my blood pressure yesterday and was pretty dismayed to see it relatively high again. 140 over 89 or so. Of course I was also watching my toddler in te grocery store at the same time so there was probably no way my blood pressure would have been low. My second reading was much better. Still, I’m pretty worried about blood pressure and really want to ask about it from a healhth care provider right now that I am pregnant.

 

I have of course, taken a couple tests since that first one. The one that I took the next mornign, seemed a hair lighter than the original one. And the one that everying was about the same.
Then I took one tonight. At first the line started forming and I thought, Oh , here it is again. But then I realized that it seemed a little lighter than the lines from before. At first, I was like “oh no…..”. But then when I went off another room and got back the line had darked pretty well – maybe I judged i it too early . Needless to say I was relieved. I do know that nothing short of a beta will give me a real picture.  But so far at least I don’t have any reasons to think there are problems.

I have been feeling exhausted. EXAUSTED. Not during the day so much, but definitely  very early in the evenings. In fact even as I’ve been typing this I keep catching myself passing out. Several times now I’ve had to go back to make sure I haven’t been typing gibbrish. Yup that bad.

Maybe on that note I should continue tomorrow?

Maybe I should….. and my tomorrow bring with it lots of reassurance news. But in gist… so far. so good.