5wks 1 day – Out of Progesterone!

November 30, 2006 at 10:25 pm 3 comments

The last few days have been hard to describe. Yes, I think about the fact that I’m pregannt every day – but it is such an abstract thought, and one I can’t really latch on to still. After TTC for so long it is somehow hard to rewire the mind – I’m not used to thinking that I’m pregnant – I’m used to thinking about the 28 day cycle and nothing beyond that.

To make matters worse I don’t FEEL pregnant. Not in the least – aside from perhaps slightly sore boobs. That’s it. Is that all? I can’t believe it but I am actually HOPING I get m/s. Please something – anything to finally make me realize its there and that something is happening.

I also started bawling over the loss of my previous pregnancy today. My baby would have been born, probably this weekend. Maybe earlier. I don’t know why it suddenly hit me so hard. Its like I feel like I was robbed of that time – that I should have been HAVING my baby now – not only starting out at the point I was way back then.

But towards the end of the day I’ve felt more calm. I WILL get into this pregancy. It WILL hit me sooner or later. I guess my life has just changed so much in these last few weeks that I just need time to adjust.

On a logistical side, I am out of PIO shots. They were supposed to deliver the refill today but FEDEX got delayed because of bad weather. So the earliest they can get it to me is now tomorrow morning. DH and I spent a good chunk of the evening looking for syringes and needles in pharmacies to get me the last bit of what was left in the bottle. Not even worth it. I probably got a third of the dosage I am supposed to. I am wondering whether to supplment with a suppository tonight. I still have some of those.

Dh and I talked a little tonight and allowed ourselves the luxury of actually dreaming about a baby. It did feel good. Somehow its been this taboo topic. Since there is still so much to go through before we actually have that “baby”. And so much could go wrong. And yet not talking about it probably makes it even worse. Its like there’s this pregnancy we’ve been waiting for forever, and we’re acting like its not there.

Hopefully soon I get to feel some symptoms. Please??? I promise I’ll be a good “nauseated woman”. Just give me a sign that this pregnancy is really there. Lest I break down and start peeing on sticks again…

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Entry filed under: All Posts, Day by Day.

19dpo – Beta 2!! Difference between Woman with IF and Fertile Myrtle

3 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Heather  |  December 1, 2006 at 2:49 pm

    When the nausea came, I was so excited (isn’t that funny?) because it meant that there was another sign I was truly pregnant. If I have a day without too much nausea, I wonder if something is going wrong instead of rejoicing from the break in the nausea.

    I hope you got your progesterone!

    Reply
  • 2. Josie  |  December 1, 2006 at 4:13 pm

    I am also one of those women longing for nausea. I have promised people that when I am pg I will not even complain.

    Reply
  • 3. pri  |  January 3, 2007 at 4:31 pm

    How is your preg. going? Today I am 5wks and 2 days and the doc. has suggested progesterone. Last night i used the first capsule. Goodness, the things we women have to go thru!! Well, I am ready for it. I have had previous miscarriage as well and I hope this preg. goes well. R u still on progesterone?

    Reply

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Expecting Number 2… :)

My TTC History

Started TTC May 2005
RE diagnosed as unexplained in Feb 06.
natural IUI #1 March 06 - BFP, m/c :(
natural IUI #2 May 06 - BFN
clomid IUI #3 July 06 - BFN
femara IUI #4 August 06 - BFN

Skipping suggested injectables,
moving to IVF
Bloodwork: Oct 12 for lupron
ER estimated 1st week of Nov

UPDATE:
25 eggs, 15 fertilized.
1 blast transferred, 6 frozen.
Precious baby Girl born in July 07.

After 2.5 years of Bliss since that BFP...

April 2009: Start of TTC #2.
(Going back for the embies I left)
Apr 15: Start of Natural FET cycle.
May 1: Transferred single blast
May 11: BFN :(
Straight to Natural FET #2
May 29: Transferred single blast
June 4: BFP!!!!
June 8: 1st beta - 177
June 10: 2nd beta - 506


UPDATE:
Healthy baby Boy born 2010!

Fast forward several years...

June 2013: Surprised with a completely natural and completely unplanned BFP!
November 2006
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