Regrouping…. (our consultation)

May 13, 2009 at 2:53 pm 4 comments

The first thing our RE wanted to discuss when we walked through the door to his office is the possible reasons the cycle did not work. He asked if transfer was painful to me in any way. Not really…
Since we had a great embie and great lining and all of that, he explained that it could be that the embie kind of just “stopped”, even though it had been doing well earlier, which he said is the most likely reason. Or that maybe it did not like the lining or something about it. Or the the uterus shoved it somewhere to a place it didn’t like – or whatever. Whatever it was, I guess we’ll never know. And its still somehow sad to me that I know for sure now that THIS one is gone forever. I try not to be too attached (since I had 6 to begin with, I know that going through their fate, whatever it is each time, might kill me). But I just have to accept that this one wasn’t meant to be.

He discussed what can be done to improve chances. Mainly two things really – doing a medicated cycle, or transferring more than one, or both. I asked why a medicated cycle really improves chances (I had read stats that it doesn’t make a difference). He said that he doesn’t really know why, but for some reason, typically it does and is the “golden standard” of FETs. He said that he doesn’t see a reason though why we can’t do another “natural” try.
I’m glad he said so, since that was my preference and I was hoping not to hear otherwise. I know I make a pretty good lining on my own, and other than hoping that transfer doesn’t fall on a weekend (when they don’t do them), I should be good. From the looks of it, for this cycle, things should work out in terms of the days.

I asked lots of questions as to what can affect outcome. Stress? BMI? Caffeine? Anything?? Stress, he said they can’t measure unfortunately, so there is no study to say either way. BMI can, if TOO high or TOO low, but he didn’t think I was in the risk category. And as for caffeine, he said that it doesn’t affect chances, but has been shown to raise chances of miscarriage, so to probably not have more than one coffee cup a day. That’s OK – I had already vowed off caffeine and didn’t drink anything but decaff after my transfer.

Of course we asked about the chances of multiples if two are transferred and he said somewhere in the neighborhood of 25-30%. The overall success rate for FETs was running at 50-55% but that was for both single and double embie transfers.

I asked if a two cycles of one for each adds up to a single cycle of two at once, and he said not exactly. That for some reason, transferring two gives higher odds also because the embryos secrete something to help them attach to the uterus and that it is believed that with both of them producing the hormone, it increases chances, even if one serves only to aid the other. Hmm.. I didn’t know that.

Having DD already of course, I know that we would rather avoid chances of twins and a toddler if possible. The RE had to tell us the funny side of facts that when couples come in the first time around, they usually REALLY want twins, but the ones who come in for a FET after already having had a child, they definitely want to avoid 2. It would be a decision we will have to make before our next transfer, which from the looks of things, will be pretty soon.

Since the RE approved us for another natural try, we will go through the entire procedure again, deja vu style. I will be going on for my sonogram next week and transfer will be scheduled accordingly if my body is ready.

I asked about other protocols that are available for FET, and he said there were lots of them and talked about them. It seemed that the main difference was in the way estrogen was administered – oral, patches, injections, etc. Regardless, a medicated cycle always actually took up TWO cycles, because you have to start lupron to shut your body down on cycle day 21 in order to have the NEXT cycle be the cycle of your FET. What this means, is that with medicated cycles, essentially your transfer dates would be no closer than 2 months apart.

Its weird with TTC number 2. Even though I feel like I have done all this before, its somehow still new terriroty. Because FETs are an entirely new thing to me, and also, now I’m thinking about the “gap” between number one and two – with each cycle it of course becomes bigger. I hopefully would not want it too big. Which is why I’m doing this now, even though I’d hardly say I’m at the ideal stage I wanted to be for another pregnancy, not to mention a ton of other “not the ideal time” factors in life. Well… there’s no ideal time. And with everything learned from surviving ttc, ANY time is a blessing.

DH and I did lunch later and discussed our thoughts on number to transfer. While we haven’t decided yet, I know we are leaning towards attempting one again. If that should fail again, we would definitely lean more towards two the next go around. For now… we are still not sure, but have a few days to decide.

I’m sad for the outcome of my previous cycle, but also today, started to feel excited about THIS cycle. Maybe… just maybe.
Lets see how it all unfolds.


Entry filed under: 1.

Officially Negative All set to go!

4 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Flower  |  May 14, 2009 at 8:02 am

    You are in our prayers….I am glad I found your blog. I am about to go through a FET cycle…(i think)

  • 2. Lut C.  |  May 14, 2009 at 2:41 pm

    I’m just going with the flow, haven’t discussed much FET protocols at all. I’m mostly worried they won’t survive the thaw.

    • 3. Jys  |  May 14, 2009 at 10:11 pm

      Flower, good luck with your cycle!!! I’m gonna go check out your blog!

      Lut, I pray your embies make the thaw – I’m sure they will!! Did your clinic give you a thaw rate? They told me at my lab that the embies have a 90% good thaw rate.

  • 4. Flower  |  May 15, 2009 at 6:46 am

    Your comment touched my heart this morning. Thank You!! Please send me the information. My email is


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Expecting Number 2… :)

My TTC History

Started TTC May 2005
RE diagnosed as unexplained in Feb 06.
natural IUI #1 March 06 - BFP, m/c :(
natural IUI #2 May 06 - BFN
clomid IUI #3 July 06 - BFN
femara IUI #4 August 06 - BFN

Skipping suggested injectables,
moving to IVF
Bloodwork: Oct 12 for lupron
ER estimated 1st week of Nov

25 eggs, 15 fertilized.
1 blast transferred, 6 frozen.
Precious baby Girl born in July 07.

After 2.5 years of Bliss since that BFP...

April 2009: Start of TTC #2.
(Going back for the embies I left)
Apr 15: Start of Natural FET cycle.
May 1: Transferred single blast
May 11: BFN :(
Straight to Natural FET #2
May 29: Transferred single blast
June 4: BFP!!!!
June 8: 1st beta - 177
June 10: 2nd beta - 506

Healthy baby Boy born 2010!

Fast forward several years...

June 2013: Surprised with a completely natural and completely unplanned BFP!
May 2009
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