Pineapples, Toddlers, and Fears…. Oh My…

Well, I am on day two. Somehow, with the transfer just being so fresh, it doesnt quite feel like the 2 week wait just yet – more of trying to take care of myself and rest and try to nurture that embie.

Which is hard with a toddler, I must say. Yesterday after gingerly laying on the couch all day and eating enough pineapple to warrant the openning of another pineapple plantation, my 30 pound toddler comes home and decides to climb atop of me and ride me horsy style (bounce up and down atop my tummy). Dh, on the other side of the room, leaped over like a lion to get her off, and was so horrified and upset he exclaimed “Well, there goes out embie!”
I was so worried and upset, I spent a good portion of the night researching similar cases that hopefully had had a good outcome. All I could think of was my poor embie that might have been trying to implant, when suddenly jolted out of its track.
But oh well, I realized after a while, there is no point stressing over it and I don’t even know if this would necessarily impact the outcome. I’ll just be as positive as possible. I was told that the embie is like a grain of sand in a sandwich (the womb) and that its real tight in there and won’t fall out. I somehow hadn’t really realized that the womb is a “sandwich” that way until I was told yesterday. I feel stupid. Iguess I never really thought about it and only envisioend the diagrams with the cross section that shows a huge cavity inside the uterus. Not really thinking that the cross section the other way has the uterus like a sandwhich wall to wall….

Anyway, enough about sandwiches.
I have calmed enough today to take it a little more easy and of course hope for the best. I really do hope it works out and that the embie is busy nestling in there.
This mornign I woke up right at the time my transfer was yesterday and the first thing I thought is that yup, its been 24 hours. I didn’t have to lay flat anymore and could get up and walk around – that was nice.

We also picked up the car today. Since we all went together with DD, it dawned on me that she hadn’t been back to that area (at least I don’t think so) since the day SHE was the little embie that implanted within me. Its so surreal really. Today she is this little person, with this most amazing personality that we discover more and more about every day. It is mindboggling that she was that embie. I truly think it is the most amazing thing about life.

I am not looking forward to the days leading up to the big result. They are always really hard somehow. The transfer is well enough behind you to not feel like it is the current thing going on and the thing to focus on. Instead it is all about the mind game …. to be or not to be. And that period right up until the last moment when you finally know somehow is terribly emotionally taxing.

But oh well… one day at a time. Today I’m still just trying to nurture that embie and hope that it is implanting within…